My wife bought me some bacon-scented underpants for Father's Day.
I hadn't worn them as I thought she was just having a joke and I didn't want to look silly in the changing room at the golf club, but the other day she said "You never wear those pants I bought you", so I felt obliged to give them a try.
I finally put them on this morning and I wish I hadn't now. Every time I take a leak I bring myself out in a rasher.
(Submitted by 'Porky' N. Bess of Beaconsfield, Bucks)
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